(In this post I will not explain the details like I usually do to get the point across, since they involve other people. I will just generalize it.)
Do you have ideals/expectations?
The ideal of how your life will turn out
The ideal upbringing
The ideal of who you will marry
The ideal of what your husband will be like
The ideal marriage
The ideal family
The ideal of being able to get pregnant
The ideal house
The ideal income
The ideal church
The ideal health
The ideal children
The ideal school or home school
I think we all have ideals and expectations of how we want these things to be. But since we live in a fallen imperfect world with imperfect people, these things can turn out much different than what we want. As a result, we can get very frustrated, upset, bitter and angry when these areas do not measure up to our expectations.
I have been praying about my specific areas and how to deal with them.
How do I not let them determine my mood and joy?
I found some answers.
1)Pray about them.
We don't need to be blind to other people's faults that affect us, but complaining doesn't help. Praying does! We can pray for God to change the person or the situation. We should also pray for God to change us. We're not perfect either and sometimes we are part of the problem.
2)Accept the facts.
The fact is life is hard and nothing and nobody in life is perfect. We all make mistakes in spite of our best intentions. This is sometimes hard for a perfectionist like me to accept!
3) Do what you can.
There is not always anything we can do, but sometimes there is. Sometimes we need to have courage and speak up in love. Sometimes we need to make new habits etc.
In each of my areas, there are MANY things to be thankful for. There are far more positives than negatives. If I pray about the negatives and then focus on the positives, I will be much happier!