Blessings?

Do you ever wish you could just have a good long break from trials?

Yep, that's me!

I sometimes feel like I am hardly over one trial and there's a new one already. As we all have our own share of troubles, I am sure I am not the only one who feels this way. That is  why I'm sharing my story.

Around 2 weeks ago, we found out we were expecting another baby. We had been hoping to get pregnant, so we were very happy. But for me it was a big step (mentally and emotionally) to get pregnant again, after the difficulties we had after our last child. I got in touch with a midwife pretty quickly and booked my first visit.

Last week I went to my first appointment and met my new midwife. I shared with her all my fears about having another child after having a special needs child with so much hospital drama. She understood completely as her fourth child had also had major problems. But she was encouraging and reminded me that this was a new pregnancy. When I left I told her I hoped that she wouldn't hear from me for a long time, as our next appointment wasn't till I was 12 weeks. (Then I was nearly 7 weeks.) That night I was thinking through everything and I was encouraged by a quote I read in a devotional book

"He who hath helped thee hitherto

Will help thee all thy journey through."

The next morning as I was about to go out the door to drop my children off at school and preschool, I was shocked and devastated to find I was bleeding. 

I couldn't help thinking "Not another trial! Can't I just have a break?"

A scan the next day confirmed that the baby had passed.

Once again I have been struggling with having the right perspective on trials.

When we told my family, my little sister sent me a song that had been a blessing to her. It is called Blessings and the chorus goes like this:

'Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops

What if Your healing comes through tears

What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near

What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise?

That's exactly what I needed to hear! It's so important to remember that trials are blessings in disguise. That God blesses us through difficulties.

Another devotion I read was a real encouragement. It was based on the words of Joseph in Genesis 41:52 "For God hath made me fruitful in the land of my affliction."

The devotion compared trials to rain. When a poet sees the rain, he doesn't simply see the rain, he can see all the flowers that will grow from the rain. And for us when we have trials, it's raining blessing. Flowers will grow in our life because of what has happened. Flowers of compassion, faith, tenderness, love, patience etc.

And another song that came to mind this morning was also a help.

My burdens keep my humble and teach me to pray

If I murmur or grumble forgive the words I say

Give me strength to carry my load day by day

But don't take my burdens or my cross away

(chorus)

For I would grow careless and idle I fear

My eyes would be dry and I'd never shed a tear

Lest I forget that I need you each day

Don't take my burdens or my cross away

With a cross on my shoulders my feet cannot stray

For the cross leads me onward to my home far away

And I will not question this price I must pay

Just don't take my burdens or my cross away